the turkey swiss on rye incident
the turkey swiss on rye incident
How come Beyoncé wears crystal-studded leotards, 6” heels and fishnets, but she dresses Blue Ivy, her baby, in regular baby clothes? It really makes you think.
How come Beyoncé chooses to drink alcohol but doesn’t have Blue Ivy drink it? Why is Blue Ivy always being carried around? Why is she so short?
I didn’t want to go to an engagement party, so I was asked to babysit my sister’s ridiculous dog instead.
you’ve made the right choice
SO I ACTUALLY DID THIS A FEW MONTHS AGO AND I DIDNT EVEN THINK THEY LOOKED AT THIS SORT OF THING SO BY THE TIME THE DELIVERY MAN CAME I HAD FORGOTTEN THAT I WROTE THAT AND THE GUY WAS REALLY CUTE. WHEN I OPENED THE DOOR HE WAS SUPER FLUSTERED AND DROPPED HIS PEN, THE BAG HOLDING THE PIZZA AND THE RECEIPTS. THEN after i signed the receipt and he was getting ready to leAVEEEE HE GOES “So… umm… did you actually put that?” and i was like “put what?” and he goes “… to.. um… tell you.. um that you’re pretty” omg it hit me that this was why he was all nervous and i started cracking up omfg then he told me that i was pretty.
i did this once but when the guy came to the door I sent my friend Martin to get the pizza and I heard muffled laughter and then Martin came back into the room with the pizza and whispered “he told me I was pretty”
This is on my bucket list
“I got both of them from local shelters. When I got her in 2006, the staff told me she was a shepherd husky. I go to the dog park, I’m meeting people with shepherd husky mixes, and they look nothing like her. I get in my car, I’m driving, I look in the rearview mirror, I see these eyes and I’m like, I’ve got a wolf in my car. Then, when she was 10-months old, there was a shepherd breeder and trainer in the dog park, and at the end of the lesson, the trainer came up to me and asked, ‘What kind of dog is that?’ And I’m thinking, Shepherd husky. You should know, you are a breeder. She said, ‘That’s a wolf.’”
Thats mildly hilarious
Robyn Lawley, Jada Sezer, and Gabi Gregg for Swimsuits For All.
Now THIS is how you sell a fucking bikini.
WHAT WHAT LEGIT CHUBBY GIRLS IN ADS?! NOT JUST HOLLYWOOD CHUBBY BUT FOR REALS CHUBBY THANK YOU BLESS
(Models Shareefa J, Robyn Lawley, Jada Sezer and fashion blogger Gabi Gregg)
this person is replying to their own text message
my little cousin got bit by a house spider and she was crying so i went to get some stuff to soothe and numb it but before i could even walk out the door i heard her quietly whisper ‘i can’t handle the responsibility of being spiderman’
tell me a secret
One time during class my drama/english teacher, who’s a devout vegan and all about not killing animals, accidentally stepped on a ladybug. He froze up and slowly cradles it in his hand and he was so heartbroken and started quoting Hamlet.
I didn’t have the heart to tell him that it was a red m&m.
I can’t breathe
OMFG!!! Their so adorable 😍😍😍
Why You Must Love Cats
Kitty en We Heart It.
Alright, so… I’ve never done a fundraiser before, and I’m only doing this one because I don’t have any other options.
My cat, Evan, has been through a lot. He was born in a litter of only three, and his two siblings died before they even opened their eyes. Not even two weeks later, the house he and his momma were living in caught fire, and by the time he was 4 weeks old, he had been abruptly separated from his mother and relocated twice before coming to live with us. He was still so young and tiny that we had to feed him kitten formula and milk for 2 weeks before he could graduate to wet kitten food.
He was also born with a deformity in his tail that causes it to have a permanent kink. Despite all this, he’s always been lively and playful; nothing could hold him back!
However, he’s recently started showing aggression toward his own tail. We thought, at first, that he was just playing with it, since the kink makes it flick just into his line of sight, but he’s only gotten progressively worse. Now he spends more time attacking it than he does playing, and we’ve started to find clumps of fur that he’s ripped out.
We need to get him to a vet, but money is extremely tight in our household. We get by alright, but because we have no concrete diagnosis, the vet is going to want to run a battery of tests—which is expensive.
So I started this fundraiser here to try to get him the help he needs. Please, please, do whatever you can. Even a dollar helps—or just passing it on if you can’t donate. Anything helps. Please.
We just want the best for our little superhero.
Bunny falls asleep
bun didn’t actually fall asleep!! bunnies flop over like this when they feel safe and comfortable in their environment. they rarely stretch out and lay down because they’re prey animals, so when ur bun does completely lays on their side or their back, it means they feel 10000% safe around you